I know we all go through changes in life, but I’m not sure I like some of them…
First, I’ve always been a morning person. I could stay up late, not set an alarm, and still be up and bright-eyed at oh-dark-thirty. Lately, not so much. I’ve actually slept through alarms twice this week. And when I do wake up, I feel like a zombie for an hour or so, long after I’ve been up, showered, and eaten. And let me tell you, there’s nothing pretty about a zombie running through the streets in the morning!
Next, I have lost my patience. Not patients, at least at the time I dropped them at the ER. But my patience – my understanding, my no-worries attitude. I know when it started to erode away, but I thought I had stopped that. Apparently not. Lately, I have no patience for stupid people doing stupid things, for people who complain but aren’t willing to lift a finger to effect change, and for people who feel they are entitled to whatever they want. I’m sorry, but just because you donated $20 to the ambulance company does not entitle you to free taxi rides to the hospital every time you sneeze. You want a ride, you pay the bill. If you don’t, the ambulance company will go bankrupt and then when you have a real emergency, you will die. End of story.
On a side note, I am so excited that states are FINALLY starting to pass laws that allow EMS providers to refuse to transport patients – no more pointless taxi rides for me, thank you very much.
Finally, my lack of motivation. I’ve always been an internally motivated person. While my family has always supported me, it’s always felt like the support was surface deep… or only for the standard issues – sports, grades, etc. But the second I try to go off-track and find my own solutions or outcomes, it feels like I am walking that path alone. Lately, my inner motivation hasn’t been working too well. It’s been far too easy to just predict and accept a failure, rather than getting up a little earlier, working harder, and such. This applies to my marathon training, to the CIA, to the “to do” list, to my desire to find a job that I actually enjoy, and to a few other assorted areas. The part that scares me is that I’m not sure how to reverse the trend, either.
I guess it’s a good thing that nobody really reads this blog, because I divulge way more information that I should…
On a different note, I did try something new this week that I absolutely loved! I roasted up a bunch of veggies for dinner on Tuesday night.
A good friend of mine raided her parents garden, and surrendered a few squash, zucchinis, and cucumbers. I sliced them all up (practicing my “rustic cut”… yeah, I really need culinary school to teach me a thing or two…), threw them on a baking sheet, drizzled with some good EVOO, and let them bake for about half an hour. One word. MMmmmm. I ate a big bowl for dinner, and still had a ton left over for lunches, which I have enjoyed since. Thank you, Medic Sarah! I can’t wait to try with some cauliflower, broccoli, and such. Lovin’ my veggies…
