(Random route through town)
44 min. / 2.4 miles
Well, tonight was another BAD workout. Nearly immediately, I felt pain in both ankles and shins. I thought I would warm up and relax a bit, but it just never happened. Ultimately, I ended up cutting my run short, doing a 180, and heading home, walking most of the way. Walking gave me time to evaluate a bit: I know I felt extremely rushed before the workout, like I was racing against an imaginary clock to get out and run before some arbitrary time limit. And at the beginning of the run, I had a lot of distractions, too – my iPod kept coming unplugged, my HR monitor stopped instead of starting, and my cell (which I carry for the GPS function…) was just an overall pain, mostly because of its size. And finally, the weather was a contributing factor, I think. It was in the low 20s, I changed what clothing I was wearing so I was constantly chilled instead of warming as I went along, and due to the storm yesterday, there was still areas where ice and slush were in my path, which I recognized was making me tense up as I tried to avoid falling on my oversized ass. From all of this, I know I was not in the correct mindset before the run even started, which I know was a big part of the negativity. For me, it is nearly all mental – especially when there is pain involved.
The huge let down for me was the timing of it. After the ChiRunning workshop on Sunday, I was really looking forward to having a good run, to put some of what I learned to work. And while I was able to do that to a small degree, by then the damage had already been done. I think I need to spend some dedicated time to just working on the form focus points, not worrying about the distance or timing, but just concentrating on correct form. I really wish I either had a treadmill, or that the high school track was clear for running – but it is still covered in snow. Actually, I really wish I had access to a high school gym… then I would have the space to do the exercises, sprints, and stretching that I do not really have room for now. The second aspect of timing – and perhaps the most damaging aspect - is that the Marine Corp Marathon opens for registration tomorrow at noon. Had this been a good workout, I would sign up with the confidence that I could train through the next 8 months and make it through in grand fashion. But because it was such a negative workout, I am now having HUGE second thoughts about whether I am cut out to be a runner, whether I can actually get motivated enough to train for a marathon, and whether I am just dreaming of a goal that is not really within my reach.
Something tells me that tonight is going to be a very long night…